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Why Facing Your Fear Leads to Good Things, Just Like Halloween!

Bottom Line Up Front: When you face your fears and take action, it leads to good things!

Fear! Halloween! Both are scary at first, but when faced with them, they lead to good things, fun, and success. So what better way to give you some tools you can use than by combining two scary yet fun things? As leaders, we could have many mind-boggling fears, such as fear of having a difficult conversation with an employee, fear of our business failing, or fear of not making progress or completing our goal or task. However, it is essential to know that when we face our fears, just like the fears of Halloween, it turns into a good thing.

Halloween is filled with scary stuff but it always leads to something fun—movies, costumes, and yes, even eating too much candy. However, when we face Halloween head-on, it becomes something good and entertaining. First, we get scared by someone that jumps out at us, and it ends in a big laugh, or we go up to a door to "Trick or Treat" (yes, some adults still do this, or so that's what a friend told me), and when the door opens, we're greeted by Frankenstein or Dracula, who, after the scare, gives us some candy. So, although you may have been afraid a bit at first, it led to a fun outcome.

Treat fear like any scary Halloween situation; move forward and face it. Once you face it head-on and get through the initial scare, determine what action to take next, then take the action. You'll then have defeated fear and be headed in a positive direction toward something good. After that, that fear will be a distant memory, just like that Snickers bar you ate from your kid's candy bag.

WHY LEADERS FACE FEARS?

There are many reasons why you should face your fear (yes, I'm being Captain Obvious as always but remember, I'm a retired Navy Captain and always state the obvious). However, the three biggest things many of us fear regarding taking action on our goal, desire, creative project, or task are (1) Getting started, (2) Staying on track, and (3) Getting it done.

When creative, action-oriented leaders face their fears regarding these three key actions, it will lead to a successful result. Conversely, by being afraid to face these fears and taking no action, you will probably not achieve positive results and may fail. While it's ok to fail when you're trying, it's not ok to fail because you didn't take action to face your fear! It's like saying I failed because I didn't even go into the haunted house to try to face my fear.

Here are some of the more common fears associated with getting started, staying on track, or getting it done:

• Fear of failure

• Fear of not knowing what to do next

• Fear of not having enough time

• Fear of what other people think

• Fear of not being creative

• Fear of too many "TA DOs" on the list

• Fear of being insecure

I don't dwell on the problems associated with something I'm trying to do. Instead, I focus on what I can do right now to be part of the solution. So, once you figure out or become aware of your fear, immediately face it, look past it, and shift your focus to what you want to accomplish and why you can do it! Then decide what you can do right now, one action, to move towards that accomplishment, and do it now no matter how big or small.

I'll discuss a few other ways to help you overcome your fears, but this is a perfect opportunity to quote one of my favorite sayings about fear and how to get past it. It's one that I came up with and have told many Sailors and civilians over the years to encourage them to keep moving forward and stop worrying about their fear (and trying to be a little funny too).I've often said: "Do you know what the best thing about beating your head against the wall is? You can stop whenever you want to!"

CREATIVES WHO FACED THEIR FEARS

Stephen King, a famous creative and author, said: "The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better."

What did Abraham Lincoln, Sir Richard Branson, James Stewart, and Warren Buffett have in common? They all feared public speaking and yet found ways to face this fear and move past it. Do you have that same fear? I know I do and have had to find ways to face it many times in the past. But I've found that once I get started and "break the ice," I do just fine.

Bear Grylls, adventurer and TV star on "Man vs. Wild," has faced his fears during tough challenges in demanding environments. He says about facing your fears: "If you really want to live empowered, you've got to face those fears."

Michael Whitt, yes—yours truly grew up in a challenging household with an adult who was an alcoholic and addicted to gambling. In May 1983, I was 18 years old and about to graduate from high school when a Navy recruiter called me. He asked if I'd like to come in for an interview to join the Navy. I was afraid but said "sure" as I had no plans for what I would do after high school, no plans to join the military, no one in my family was ever in the military, as well as several other negatives in my life, so I figured what have I got to lose.

I went in for the interview, and the recruiter told me I could join the Navy, but I would have to go in as an E1 (as low as you can start) and be on a submarine. If that wasn't scary enough, he said I'd have to leave in a month, thus two weeks after graduating high school. It was go now, or they couldn't use me for another year (or so he said). Talk about fear! I had only ever left Ohio once, and that was to the next state over. I'd never been on a ship or seen the ocean in person! He gave me one hour to decide on the biggest fear I had ever encountered! I decided to move forward, face my fear, and look past it, thinking that maybe I could make something better in my life if I joined the Navy. By facing my fear and moving past it through action, I joined the U.S. Navy as a Fireman Recruit (E-1), and 38 years later, I retired honorably as a Navy Captain (O-6)!

The world is filled with stories of successful people who faced their fears, got started, kept going, and made it to the finish line. If they can do it, so can you!

Now it's your turn. I've told you my story of facing fear, and I'm sure you have at least one of your own. If you've faced your fear at least once, no matter how big or small, and I think everyone has at least once, you can do it again! What's your story or favorite one that inspires you? Recall it. Write it down. Commit it to memory and use it whenever you need a boost to face a fear

HOW TO FACE YOUR FEAR

Simply put, you face your fear through action. One of my favorite quotes is from a famous creative, entrepreneur, and writer who wrote one of the best books ever – "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Dale Carnegie said, "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy." I would have said, "Go out and get hot!" which is a Navy term meaning to get it done now.

There are many ways to face your fears and get you moving in the right direction. Below are a few of my favorite "go-to" moves that have worked for me. Give them a try, or create your own.

• "How Do You Eat An Elephant? One Bite At A Time!" is a saying that can be very useful when facing a fear of a big or scary creative piece. Eating an elephant one bite at a time means you should take it one step at a time when working on getting past the fear of a large or challenging project. Do this: Take the next smallest step you can do right now to help you get past that fear. Then another, until you've gotten past your fear (eaten the elephant, and no, not literally).

• Do Your 3 Most Important Things First. If you want to face a fear and move past it, do your 3 most important things first in the morning. Do this: The night before, create a list of the actions you need to take to face your fear and move past it. Next, determine the 3 most important things on the list, if completed, that would have the most significant positive impact on facing your fear and getting past it. Schedule these 3 tasks on your calendar for first thing in the morning before anything else. Complete them in the morning at the scheduled time.

You've just done the hardest part: getting past your fear and getting started, and it didn't take long. Once you get a successful result, it builds self-confidence when facing future fears. As Dale Carnegie says in his book "Public Speaking And Influencing Men In Business, "once you do the thing you fear to do and get a record of successful experiences behind you, it helps you conquer this fear in the future and develop courage."

Give these processes for facing your fear a try. Try all of them and others you come across and find out what works for you. But what works for some folks may not work for others, and what works for you today may not work tomorrow, so keep an open mind and don't be afraid to change as needed.

So next time you become aware of fear regarding your goal, desire, creative project, or task, keep going and face it. Then, take any action to move past it, and you will be successful. Remember, it's just like walking towards a scary-looking house on Halloween night — go on up to the door and don't worry about being afraid, knowing that facing your fear will lead to success and maybe even a sweet treat!

Happy Halloween!

Vr Mike

To Getting It Done!

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